Shiny Patent Leather Shoes

When I was a little girl, there was nothing more special than having a black pair of Patent Leather Shoes; the shinier, the better. They were only to be worn for very special occasions along with pretty white little socks that folded over with pink lace. To scuff a shoe was heart breaking.

I was reminded of these precious shoes over the past couple of days because of the mean-spirited folks I have been crossing paths with recently on ‘Social Media’. However, there were also so many caring folks that shared the same Scripture with me at different times: ‘Shake the dust off your feet’ from :

Matthew 10:

14 “Whoever does not receive you, nor heed your words, as you go out of that house or that city, shake the dust off your feet.

I do find that difficult to do. I don’t like to give up on anyone. I’d rather find a way to resolve things, whenever possible. However, I am learning that it simply is not always possible and that saddens me. Another Scripture that sort of goes along with that one is:

Matthew 7:

“Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.”

Jesus was very clear about setting healthy boundaries. I suppose this does not come easily for me because of all of the past abuse issues in my life. Abuse victims often end up at one of two extremes. They either have no healthy boundaries to protect them from mean and heartless people, or they put walls up letting no one into their heart. Both of those choices result in harmful consequences perpetuating the abuse.

For whatever reason, perhaps simply to be reminded it is time to shine up my pretty black Patent Leather Shoes, I have had an endless assault from other grieving moms. Thankfully, they are few in comparison to all of the loving and supportive moms. A couple of moms have reminded me that just because someone has lost a child, that doesn’t mean they are a nice person. When I hear such things, my mind is boggled. I find it very difficult to comprehend that anyone who has lost a child and has lived through such indescribable anguish, could ever knowingly and willingly want to hurt another grieving mom. That is an animal with which I am totally unfamiliar. If losing a child does not cause a person to be more vigil and more compassionate toward others, what will?

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 5 For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. 6 If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. 7 Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.” 2 Cor. 1:3-7

Perhaps, the mean-spirited ones have never sought comfort from God. They are incapable of giving what they have never received. Their haughtiness, envy, and rejection of others speaks volumes and is very self-revealing. Such folks are bullies. They’re the kid on the playground that sees your Shiny Patent Leather Shoes and will throw rocks at them to scuff them up. They can’t be happy for you if something goes well for you; they are only satisfied if you are as miserable, or more so, than they are. They may have the appearance of someone who has successfully put their life together after their loss, but appearances can be deceiving.

1 Corinthians 10:

12 Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall.

Proverbs 16:

18 Pride goes before destruction,
    a haughty spirit before a fall.

If they present themselves as if they ‘have it all together’, yet make you feel like crap about yourself, you are probably in a better place than they are. Why? Because you’re being honest and real. You are walking in the Light of truth, rather than self-deception.

Yes, I do believe it’s time I shine up those black Patent Leather Shoes, shake the dust off my feet, stop casting my pearls before swine, and allow the Peace of God to comfort me.

Anyone care to join me?

God is Love (1 John 4:8, 16), and true Love doesn’t make you feel like crap. I’d rather feel special like I did by putting on those Shiny Patent Leather Shoes.

(((HUGS)))  Jude Gibbs, Author of ‘Gifts from the Ashes’ available at:

Also, a Contributor on ‘The Mighty’:

Please help spread the word…TY!!!  (((HUGS)))

Released 2/15/17



2 thoughts on “Shiny Patent Leather Shoes

  1. “They either have no healthy boundaries to protect them from mean and heartless people, or they put walls up letting no one into their heart. Both of those choices result in harmful consequences perpetuating the abuse.”

    I believe the sheer anguish of child loss has a similar effect as abuse. It either makes one stronger and more compassionate or the opposite, cold hearted, mean and judgmental.

    I’ve seen one or the other in every bereaved parent I’ve come across in my 14 years on this journey. Like anything else, there’s two sides, one beautiful and one ugly. Polish up those shoes mama! and don’t let ANYONE stop you from your mission to help others.

    💛Love you Jude💛


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